crappy movies

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I Want My Money Back!

Published January 10, 2012 by asickandtwistedperspective

I am enough of a horror movie fan to know, when one goes to see a horror movie, one does not expect too much.  Often the movie turns out to be more funny, than it is scary  which let’s face it, is half the appeal.  The other half being seeing people killed in all kinds of interesting ways. The bloodier the better.

It was with this in mind that I went to see The Devil Inside.  Which……HUGE MISTAKE.  Of all the times I’ve wished to get moments back in my life….I want that one hour and twenty-seven minutes of nails on a chalkboard awfulness back!!  Or my thirteen dollars, but I would rather have the time back.  I don’t know if this is common knowledge but if  one leaves a movie less than halfway through, you are entitled to ask for your money back.  I am sorry to say I sat through the whole thing, and therefore was not entitled to a refund.  But I digress…..

The movie is shot as to be a documentary about a woman whose mother is now in mental institution in Rome, after having killed three people during her own exorcism.  An interesting premise, but the premise is the only interesting thing about the movie.  All the best parts of this movie, are shown in the commercial. To be fair, there are two scenes in the movie that I actually did like but, the rest of the nonsensical footage  is just filler. In one of only two scenes with an actual exorcism, a woman is tied to the bed, and inexplicably starts bleeding copiously from the vagina. She is not being touched, or violating herself with anything….she just simply startes bleeding.  I find this scene incredibly offensive.  The filmakers obviously think a woman’s bodily functions are the most horrifying and shocking thing they can think of.  Which brings us to the ending….one of the worst, most unlikely endings I’ve ever seen.  I say this realizing suspension of disbelief is necessary for watching this genre.   It was just an all around, unpleasant experience. 

In my opinion, the movie was so bad, because the flow was jerky, and predictable, and because there was barely a plot to follow.  It was the kind of movie, one could text, or use the computer, while watching, and still know what was happening the whole time.  I read somewhere that this is happening a lot, that media is becoming increasingly dumbed down in order to accommodate people who want to give their attention to more than one thing at a time.  All I can to these people is PUT THE FRACKING PHONE DOWN YOU’RE RUINING IT FOR THE REST OF US!! 

That is all.